Netvort Parshas Vayishlach 5772:      THE INNER DIMENSION

By Rabbi Joshua (inwardly known as the Hoffer) Hoffman

 

The Torah tells us that after Yaakov’s encounter with Eisav he journeyed to Sukkos where he resided, as Rashi cites from the Midrash, for eighteen months. He then came, intact, to the city of Shechem, in the land of Canaan, bought a parcel of land there from the children of Chamor, father of Shechem, and set up an altar to G-d (Bereishis 33:17-20). 

The next incident we are told of is that of Yaakov’s daughter Dinah going out to observe young women of the land, and being abducted and raped by Shechem. Yaakov then waits to formally react until his sons return home and they enter into negotiations with Chamor over Dinah. Chamor tells them that his son desires Dinah and offers a substantial financial arrangement to retain Dinah for him. The Ramban points out that it was Dinah’s great beauty that brought Shechem to desire her so much, yet nothing about her beauty is mentioned in the Torah. On the other hand, he says, the Torah does speak about the beauty of Sarah, Rivkah, and Rochel. The difference says the Ramban, is that Dinah’s beauty proved to be a pitfall for her and the Torah only mentions beauty when it is praise for the righteous.

Interestingly, while the Ramban says that the Torah's mention of Sarah’s beauty is a praise for her, the Midrash tell us that Chapter 31 of Mishlei, which speaks of Eishes Chayil, the woman of valor, was actually the eulogy that Avraham delivered for his wife Sarah. In that eulogy, Avraham said, “Beauty is vanity.” If beauty, as the Ramban says, is praise for the righteous women, why did Avraham in his eulogy for his beautiful wife refer to beauty as vanity?

Avraham was obviously saying that beauty taken as an objective value per se is vanity. Beauty, however, that reflects an inner set of values and character traits is worthy of praise, because the true beauty is within. Sarah’s inner righteousness and fear of G-d reflected out onto her physical appearance and it was this important aspect of Sarah that Avraham eulogized when he said that beauty is vanity, ending saying that a woman who fears G-d is truly worthy of praise.

I once heard the late Reb Shlomo Carlebach relate that a friend tried to suggest a certain woman for him as his true soul mate. Reb Shlomo declined the offer and his friend detected that the reason was that the woman was not particularly good looking. When he told Reb Shlomo he was surprised that he would even think of such things. Reb Shlomo answered that if she would truly be his soul mate she would look beautiful to him. Reb Shlomo was saying that the true beauty that he was looking for in potential soul mate was the kind of beauty that reflected from inside outwards.