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Parshas Vayishlach 5771: Confrontation
By Rabbi Joshua (strategically known as The Hoffer) Hoffman
In the beginning of this week's parsha, Yaakov prepares to meet with Esav after
twenty-years of separation. The midrash tells us that when the rabbis used to
meet with officials of foreign governments, particularly that of Rome, they
would study this parsha for guidelines on how to confront them. Interestingly,
when Menachem Begin was Prime Minister of Israel and prepared to make his first
trip to the United States to speak with the President and other officials, he
went to see Rav Menachem Man Shach, zt'l, for advice on how to conduct
himself. Rav Shach told him to study the confrontation between Yaakov and Esav
as described in Vayishlach. Esav, as the forerunner of the nation of Edom,
thus represented the physical embodiment of the nemesis of the Jewish people,
and it is therefore instructive to study how Yaakov was able to weather the
challenge that he faced.
As the midrash, cited by Rashi, points out, we see from our parsha that
Yaakov armed himself with three strategies in confronting Eisav- with prayer,
with a gift and with a battle array. Rav Moshe Tzvi Neriah, in his Ner
LaMaor, writes that these were not really three separate tactics that Yaakov
used. Rather, he prepared himself to bribe Eisav, and if that didn't work, he
prepared to engage him in battle. However, both of these tactics were
coupled with prayer to God, because Yaakov knew that no matter what he did to
prepare for his confrontation, it is ultimately God who decides what the
outcome will be.
In the piyut, or liturgical prayer, of U'Nesaneh Tokef that is recited in
most communities on both Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur, we say that
teshuvah, or repentance, and tefillah, or prayer, and tzedakah, or charity,
remove the evil decree. Rav Yosef Dov Soloveitchik, zt'l, explained that these
are not three independent tactics of removing the evil decree, but, rather, two
methods of repenting-through prayer, and through charity. Thus, in regard to
confronting the physical Esav, we use either or both a bribe and a battle
array, both coupled with prayer. When confronting our inner Eisav, “our
spiritual challenges from within,” we do not begin with prayer, but with
repentance. Why this difference? I believe that the answer lies in the
fundamental difference between the natures of these two confrontations.
In regard to confronting the physical Esav, we must remember that even though
we are responsible to do all we can to prevent him from harming us, we need to
remember that it is God, and not us, who runs the world and decides the outcome
of the confrontation. In regard to our inner struggle, however, it is up to us
to make the initial move toward repentance, and we are then assured that we
will receive divine help in completing the process. This is what the famous
repentant, Rav Eliezer ben Deradiah, learned, as recorded in the Talmud (Avodah
Zarah 17) when he asked the heavens the mountains, the rivers, etc., to pray
for him, and they all refused. He then realized, that 'the matter is dependent
only upon me,' as the Talmud tells us, his prayer was received and that he
merited his portion in the next world. We thus say, on Rosh Hashanah and
Yom Kippur, that repentance, through prayer and/or through charity, will
remove the evil decree. Perhaps we can suggest that prayer and charity reflect
two basic kinds of repentance-one, represented by prayer, in which we
completely transform our personality and return fully to God, and another, represented
by charity, in which we change slowly, deed by deed, as represented by
charity. In any case, the process must start with us, and, in return, we will
receive divine assistance.